Wanted Dead or Alive Parody - Always I am Adam

Have you ever wondered what kind of person I am? Probably not. But I decided to make a parody about myself anyway. My likes, my life, what I've done; basically, a very vague description of who I am. Some things are obvious, others are just weird and might not make any sense to some. But it's all true nevertheless.
Sadly, I do want to explain a couple things. 1st. When I say that I have a son and out of my children he's number one, I don't mean that he's my favorite, I mean that he was my first. I only have one child after all - so far.
2nd. I am bad at shaving everyday, but I slightly exaggerate because I think it's funnier.
Lastly, when I wrote this parody I thought the name of the song was Dead or Alive. In keeping with my "same-syllable-count" title, my parody was going to be I am Adam. When I learned that the song was Wanted Dead or Alive, I changed my title to fit the syllables. So, even though I actually never say it in the song, the title is Always I am Adam. I didn't feel like re-writing anything. I could argue that the end kind of says that I'm always Adam, but make your own decision. It is just a title anyway.

Original: Wanted Dead or Alive by Bon Jovi http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oot0GtjQuxQ


Always I am Adam

So this is me
In all of my glory
I'll tell you things
That no one else can see.

I've got my flaws
But I've got all of my highs too
I am the last son
Of Bill and Sue.

I am Adam
I really enjoy acting
With a bass voice
Yes I can sing
Glasses, I'm near-sighted.

Sometimes I shave
Sometimes it's not for days
It's sad to tell the days
By the hair on my face.

The only sisters I have
Are my two in-laws
Running the rides at Kings Island
Was my first job.

I am Adam
I have one child; a son
My children (children)
He's number one
A phone (the sax) I used to play.

Oh, I'm Adam

I am Adam
Eight is my favorite number
Green is my (guess what)
Favorite color.

And it is easy
To sing the alphabet backwards
I don't talk too much
I'm a man of few words.

My hair is brown
My eye color is blue
Everything here is 
One-hundred percent true.

I am Adam
I like making parodies
And maybe (one day)
I'll be known for these.

Oh yes, I am Adam
And I really love my wife
And she loves me (loves me)
Dead or alive.

Yeah, that's right
That is right
Dead or alive.

Say again
One more time
Dead or alive.

No matter what
Whether I am
Dead or alive
I am Adam.

Your Song Parody - My Songs

Well, look at that. Three years past. Where has the time gone? I honestly don't think I'm doing too bad. I've made quite a few parodies. I'm glad that I decided to share them with the world. And gee, that's the whole point of this parody. Funny how that works out.

Original: Your Song by Elton John http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13GD78Bmo8s


My Songs

They're a little bit funny
The things that I write.
And even when they're not they
Fight the good fight.
I can't make CDs
But girl if I did
I'd make money and
Happily we'd live.

The parody writer
Huh, is what I've become.
Not a man who can write songs
But instead just makes fun.
I know that my dreams seem unrealistic
Out of all the song writers
I want to get picked.

I've got to tell everybody these are my songs
'Cause what if I don't and everything goes wrong?
And no one ever
And no one ever
No one ever finds me
What'll happen to my creations
My Parodies?

It started simple
A nice fun joke here and there
But it blossomed into
A fun Passion
They all might not be
The best ever written
But there are a few that
Make me think again.

So excuse me forgetting
Some of my lyrics
It's hard to make all of
My ideas stick.
Anyway, maybe one day
My dream will come true
My parodies will all be popular too.

I've got to tell everybody these are my songs
'Cause what if I don't and everything goes wrong?
And no one ever
And no one ever
No one ever finds me
What'll happen to my creations
My Parodies?

And what if no one
And what if no one
No one ever finds me
What'll happen to me creations
My parodies?

Bad Romance Parody - Cool Yo-yo

So, Gaga huh? I'm sure this will spike interest. I wrote this on my birthday, actually. When I was still working at Cinfed. The best I remember is that I just made fun of whatever she was singing in the beginning. The "whoa oh oh" whatever. So, "Yo-yo!" I just make fun of such and outdated toy and have some fun with others. Maybe you love the yo-yo, maybe your childhood is based on ball-in-a-cup; fine. I'm just having fun.

Original: Bad Romance by Lady Gaga http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrO4YZeyl0I

Cool Yo-yo

Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
I have a cool yo-yo.
Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
It is a cool yo-yo.

Rah rah rock the cradle.
Around 'round the world.
Wah wah walk the dog
With my cool yo-yo.

Rah rah rock the cradle.
Around 'round the world.
Wah wah walk the dog
With my cool yo-yo.

Listen to me, all girls and boys
Throw away all of your expensive toys
And play with me.
Come, come, come, and play with me.

I have a special toy for everyone.
Some string plus some plastic equals so much fun.
Yo-yos are fun.
Fun, fun, fun, they're so much fun.

You've got to roll with it.
Yes, the pun is intended.
Mine is so cool
Cool yo-yo.

Get rid of them
Throw away all your toys
All you need is a cool yo-yo
(yo-yo-oh-oh-oh)

Just look at me
You know that I'm cool
It is because of my cool yo-yo.

Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
I have a cool yo-yo.
Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
It is a cool yo-yo.

Rah rah rock the cradle.
Around 'round the world.
Wah wah walk the dog
With my cool yo-yo.

I'm not talking 'bout ball-in-a-cup
They are already cool
So now give it up for the yo-yos
Give praise for all the yo-yos.

We're going back to simplicity now.
Some of you are skeptics
You're wondering how can they be fun
Yes, yes, yes, just play with one.

You've got to just try it
And I know that you'll like it
Because they're cool
Cool yo-yos.

You can do it
You can be just like me
All you need is a sweet cool yo-yo
(yo-yo-oh-oh-oh)

We will be awesome
Be the envy of all
'Cause we walk around with cool yo-yos

Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
I have a cool yo-yo.
Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
It is a cool yo-yo.

Rah rah rock the cradle.
Around 'round the world.
Wah wah walk the dog
With my cool yo-yo.

Rah rah rock the cradle.
Around 'round the world.
Wah wah walk the dog
With my cool yo-yo.

Pull the string up
On your finger
Catch it in your hand

Pull the string up
On your finger
Catch it in your hand

Pull the string up
On your finger
Catch it in your hand

Pull the string up
On your finger
It's all in the wrist, baby.

You know I'm cool
I'm the coolest around
When my yo-yo spins
It makes the sweetest sound

There is no French
For the word yo-yo
I don't speak French
So what do I know?

Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
I have a cool yo-yo.
Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
It is a cool yo-yo.
(simultaneously with)
So what do I know?
Tell me, what do I know?
I just don't know
Maybe it's yo-yo!

They are so cool 
I can barely stand it
Oh my gosh, I can't take no more
(yo-yo-oh-oh-oh)

I can see
You don't have what it takes
To be so cool and awesome with me.

Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
I have a cool yo-yo.
Yo-yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Yo-yo
It is a cool yo-yo.

Rah rah rock the cradle.
Around 'round the world.
Wah wah walk the dog
With my cool yo-yo.

Welcome Back

One year gone. Happy two year anniversary. So, I havn't written in a while. Sorry about that. It makes me a little sad that that happened. I've been thinking about it lately, and I'm thinking about starting again. I've written a few parodies since the last time I posted. The last one I wrote was in March 2011. I never posted them, and I don't know why. Remember my Chicken On The Run post? I said I was sad that I hadn't written anything in a while? Well, I'm sad that I stopped Parody Universe and didn't even try to come back. But I've had two years to rest and I've come up with so many song ideas; I just have to make them now. Sadly, I've lost a lot of interest, but I'll try to do this again. I already failed my one-parody-every-week promise, so I'll just say that I'll post when I can. It will be harder for me to write my parodies now. When I worked at Cinfed, I had plenty of time to do whatever when we weren't busy. But I have a new job now that requires constant attention. Basically, I don't have the luxary to stop and write down my ideas.  I may or may not explain how the ideas came or what parts were spontaneous and what was forced. I don't even remember for the most part. I'll just write what comes to mind.

Let me say a few things and straighten out some loose ends. I'm still not techno savvy, so I still can't make videos or real songs of my parodies, even though that would be cool. Also, Amanda and I are married now! Yay! And we even have a son too! I never did this when it actually happened, so I'll do it now: Danielle, thank you so much for your comments. I always like to read them and it makes me happy that you like my parodies. I especially thank you for your comment on Slutty In The USA; it always makes my smile. Again, thank you. I'd thank Haily too for her two comments, but she's not here anymore. Lastly, thank you too, Captain. You did comment and I won't forget it. It was a good ego boost.

Alright. Let's get this underway. Welcome back to Parody Universe!

Hey Jude Parody - Hey Dude

In all honesty, the whole idea of this parody came from Amanda when we had been dating for a year or two. If we watch a movie at home, and it's a movie we've both seen, we usually talk through it and make fun of it or just talk about it. If we have not seen it, I like to watch it and still talk about it a little and make some fun of it, but still watch most of it. Amanda would want to talk about other off-topics with nothing to do with the movie. At the theaters, talking is not an option; except for Amanda. So I told her my annoyance of her talking and she said I should tell her when I annoyed her. "You should tell me to stop." She said. "Just turn to me and go, 'Dude, stop talking.' You have to say 'Dude' though or it won't work." Then she started singing "Hey dude, leave me alone. I am trying..." And years later I decided to complete her joke. She made up the first two lines herself and the rest took some time to come up with.

Original: Hey Jude by The Beatles http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDdI7GhZSQA



Hey Dude

Hey dude, please stop talking
I am trying to watch this movie
I cannot hear what is being said
And I dread missing key plot points

Hey dude, leave me alone
I am trying to pay attention
Why do you insist on talking to me
Can't you please just leave me alone

This is one thing that I hate. Hey dude, please wait
I will talk to you when I am free
For well you know I don't want to just ignore you
But I really don't want to talk now
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah

Hey dude, you can do it
I know you have the ability
All you have to do is shut your mouth
And keep your thoughts to yourself

Just wait for a better time. Hey dude, be kind
This is not the time nor the place
And don't you know that's it's just you? Dude, get a clue
You don't hear anybody else talking
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah yeah

Hey dude, please stop talking
I am trying to watch this movie
I will talk to you after "The End"
But until then, please leave me
Alone alone alone alone alone alone yeah!
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Hey dude!
(Etc.)

Dancing Queen Parody - Glofing King

So, I was going to go golfing one day, and the day before this idea popped in my head. The title was spontaneous and as I was golfing, the rest of the song came to me pretty easily. That's all.

Original: Dancing Queen by Abba http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=REElUors1pQ

Golfing King

You can swing
You can putt
Mostly you rely on luck
Set that tee
Make your swing
You are the golfing king

Waking up at the crack of dawn
Strapping your bag of golf clubs on
Make sure you have your drivers
And your putters too
And ten different irons
You don't want to shoot into trees
Land in water, sand traps, or weeds
Then you have to choose your club
Which one will you use
A wedge or 9 iron
Show when it is your turn

You are the golfing king
You're the guy
With that super swing
Golfing king
Listen to all the birdies sing (Golf pun)
Miss water
And sand traps
Get on the fareway or past (Please)
All your hits
Promising
You are the golfing king

You're on the green looking cocky
You got there in one shot not three
Shooting under one-hundred
Isn't hard to do
You think you should go pro
Then everyone will know

You are the golfing king
There's something
You are not telling
Golfing king
You're so good it's almost sickening (But hey)
Titlest
Pinnicall
Callaway, Top Flight, Maxwell
Choose your ball
Make it zing
You are the golfing king
Hail the golfing king

Ticking Parody - Loving

Now this was a milestone! I thought Bohemian Rhapsody would be an accomplishment, then Hotel California, but Ticking is so long that I never imagined I could do it. Also, it's a long story as well. So here is my attempt at a longer story. "Screaming for a wife" to "You kissed...to you" was spontaneous and everything else was thought of at work. The first few lines came easily, but it was the last few before the "chorus" that took a while. The syllables just wouldn't cooperate. Nine hours is a long enough time to wrap my mind around a parody and put it all together.


Original: Ticking by Elton John http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=So15b6XNuK0



Loving

"An extremely loving child" is what your family always say
"He's always given out cards to kids on Valentine's Day"
So what is the reason that you have never gotten wed?
Your parents are worried you may be messed up in the head

It's not like you have never tried; it is quite the contrary
You have asked many girls out, but got shot down to your dismay
You have never been on a date in all your life
And every single day you always hear your mother gripe

"I want a little girl now" mama said
Remember mama said
Loving, loving
"Get to it; find a wife
Give me a daughter"
Do it, do it, loving, loving

There you were crying in a downtown bar screaming for a wife
Some goof said "He's just love sick. He needs to get a life"
You kissed a pretty lady who came way too close to you
Oh she did not appreciate that too much and she slapped you

Promising to find love before the day was done
But as you walked away from the bar, your reality dawned (it dawned)
You have tried your whole life, why would today be different
You decided it was useless and you gave up on it

"Now I'll never get grandchildren" mama said
Remember mama said
Loving, loving
"Everyone in the world can do it
Why can't you?"
Do it, do it, loving, loving

You called your best friend Jesse, knowing you would not be made fun of
You cried and complained for so long about your troubles to find your love
Then Jesse said "How about this: why don't you marry me?"
That statement made you see the obvious: that Jesse was a she

"I have loved you ever since I met you, but you couldn't tell"
And then you knew, in your heart, you wanted her as well
After all this time, here it was. You finally had your shot
The story of two best friends who secretly loved each other was so hot

"We're not getting any younger" mama said
Remember mama said
Loving, loving
"What are you waiting for? Propose, get married and start your life"
Do it, do it, loving, loving